Sex

I realized today that I don’t know the gender neutral term for ‘handjob.’ I was trying to convince Justine to ‘take one for the team’ because, as her single male friend, it is her duty to provide we with a constant stream of beautiful women with low self-esteem. Epic fail on her part. She informed [...]

Lori Drew Should Get The Chair

You see, this is why I try to avoid the news as much as humanly possible, because when I do decided to focus on the serious issues, something like The United States vs. Lori Drew is invariably in the news. Stuff like this tends to bring out the irate, cynical, world-despising Draconian in me (more [...]

Injection

So I’m been working pretty steadily all morning up until about 30 minutes ago, so I figured I’d drop a blog post in my time before my 4pm conference call.
I’ve been listening to Rise Against all morning and feeling like a borderline hypocrite for it. Mostly I’ve been listening to “Injection” which I’ve added to [...]

Old Time Hockey Is Back

I’ve been playing hockey since I could stay standing on skates. I scored a goal on my first shift playing Mite Hockey for Parkway by skating in on a breakaway and crashing into the goalie, sliding the puck between his legs in the process. The next year, because Parkway had a screwy system for assigning [...]

A Cynic’s Lament

I feel like for all my talk about being a cynic, I never really believed any of it. All my sarcasm, and cutting witticisms were merely smoke and mirrors. My cleverly crafted diatribes on the ups and downs of love and loss and relationships were penned the air of a man impervious to everything except [...]