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Captain America. Hates Nazis. Hates Commies. Loves America
I love Fourth of July weekend, because it is the one weekend out of the year that liberals, commies, feminists and other undesirables can’t say shit when I wear my “United We Stand” American flag T-shirt (I couldn’t find my “These Colors Don’t Run” shirt). As I said to someone last night, I love being American. Yeah sure we’re fucking loud and obnoxious at times, but the whole do/say/destroy whatever we want attitude meshes perfectly with my personality. Maybe we’re (I’m) not perfect, but really what other options do you have?
That sentiment was much more coherent when I was about 64 Miller Lites (brewed in Milwaukee, which is actually in America despite its proximity to Canada) deep, but moving on…
The point is I love being American. Its something I’ve never been ashamed of, despite how I’m supposed to feel with all the white-guilt/male-guilt/American-guilt. Whatever, my grandmother’s Irish Catholic; I learned to ignore feelings of guilt a long time ago. So Fourth of July is one of favorite holidays, which is why I’ve been celebrating with a five day bender interspersed with most American activities I can manage to accomplish. These are included but not limited to:
- Watching 10 Things I Hate About You on television (because watching good movies edited for TV is the picture of laziness, especially when you own the same movie in its unedited version). Also, love the movie and Letters to Cleo.
- Watching the Red Sox and marking out for new commentator Sean “The Mayor” Casey. Baseball is America’s past-time and Casey is America’s past-time’s mayor. Plus he’s a 9.7 on the unintentional comedy scale.
- Watching Bill Pullman’s speech from Independence Day several, several times. It’s sort of a tradition of watching ID4 with my dad on July 4th. Other movies dad and I watch include The Patriot*.
- Nearly blowing off my face and deafening myself with fireworks of questionable legality on the beaches of Hull.
- Carting enough beer/melted ice that I think at one point I dislocated my shoulder.
- Shooting a Roman candle out of my mouth.
- Eating an enormous burger and an enormous hot dog while drinking Miller Lites.
- Sleeping past noon several days in a row.
- Hitting up bon-fires
- Singing along to acoustic guitars
While I would like to continue with some more awesomeness, my hangovers have significantly depleted my ability to function whatever do-hickey in my brains makes coherency come out. Enjoy being imperialist pigs, everyone!
Peace,
{VM}
* I realize that makes two Heath Ledger references, and I am aware that he is Australian.
Filed under: Ramblings | Tagged: America, beer, Bill Pullman, Independence Day, July 4th, Letters to Cleo, Miller Lite, patriotism, Sean Casey, The Boston Red Sox, Wade Boggs
I’m incredibly jealous that you can shoot Roman candles out of your mouth. That’s amazing. Something that I actually am really jealous of is that you got to sleep in late. I never ever get to do that any more. *sigh* Oh well.
Is your shoulder okay?
Yeah it’s fine. Just stiff/sore. I deserve it. Karma for stupidity and such.
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